Hi. My name is Stephanie Chan. Most of my friends just call me Steph. I heard that there would be a play this Easter in Glad Tidings PJ loosely based on my life. I am highly impressed with the amount of blogs and publicity the production, called 'Broken', is having!
The story is about what I’ve gone through, and how God brought me out and showed me that even when all hope is gone, He is still faithful. And isn’t that what life is about, friends? Faith in God? Billy Graham once said this: “We cannot truly face life until we face the fact that it will be taken away from us.”
I’ve had many things taken away from me, yet, at the end, I look towards the final reunion with the ones I love, and with God. As God gives abundantly, everything I have is His, and does not the owner retain the right to take back?
Goodness, I sound so melancholic! I don’t want to give a bad impression on my first post, no, else the blog admin would be removing it =). I was asked to write a little more of the characters that will appear in this Easter production, so I will do just that and hopefully not give too much away.
"Well, let’s start with me. Stephanie, or simply, Steph."
I am really excited to see how I am portrayed! I hear that there are some songs ‘I’ would be singing. I am curious about that, since the last time I sang on stage was as a 6 year old, that there is a reason why it was the LAST time! I suppose the actress playing me will definitely sound infinitely better than me.
Let’s see. About me. I was raised in a Christian family; my dad works in a large MNC, and my mom a homemaker. Along with my two sisters, we learned about Jesus Christ, Christmas, Easter and all that in Sunday School. I wasn’t the model christian, no. I suppose like everyone, college and university life gave a little too much freedom without guidance. I didn’t do drugs or whatever, but I was drinking, partying, smoking and not exactly living the life of Mother Theresa =). It all changed over a christmas–I think I was 22 years old–in a rally where I rededicated myself to God and recommitted into ministries. I remember Pastor Francis and his wife counselling me like I was a teenager still!
Ah, Eddie. He was just the kind I liked. He wasn’t brash, or boastful, no. He was very unassuming, quietly doing his task, never getting too worked up, always in front of that computer of his. He loved helping people out, and doing charity works and he always talked about starting his own charity for street children when he made enough money. We’ve known each other since high school. We got together after college and when we were 26, he proposed."Of course, then there was Eddie."
There was no huge diamond ring, no; he couldn’t afford it, but it didn’t matter. He could give me a coke can ring for all I care! We were married a year later.
Eddie was perfect, except that he wasn’t a Christian. I never thought too much about it; and when Pastor Francis talked to me, I dismissed it. I mean, I see many couples doing fine and they don’t go to church together. Eddie and I traveled together. We didn’t go Europe or US or anything, no. We went places like Ipoh, Malacca, Langkawi and even once as far as Bangkok! He wasn’t stingy, but he was very careful with his money, because he grew up very poor. To me, it didn’t matter. I married the man I love and know that he loves me in return.
Well, that issue grew, it seems. Eddie was very adamant about not going to church or being a christian. He believes most christians are hypocrites. I am of course, saddened by that, and all efforts to change his mind have failed. I am resigned to just pray for him, but now, 6 years after marriage, I can understand why Pastor Francis spoke to me about marrying a non-christian. I didn’t realise it would be such a big issue between us; but eventually it did become one.
We never really talked much about it, no. He didn’t mind me praying alone or reading the bible; but he doesn’t like being prayed for. He always said he made it without God’s help so far, why should he depend on God now?
Our marriage hit some rough patches. I never thought I would argue with Eddie but we did. We had such different views; about abortion, about homosexuality. He always thought I was judgmental about it but no, it wasn’t the will of God for these things to be! He wanted me to stay home on Sundays and the weekends but those were the days when I had to be in church for my ministries. He believed that we should not force a religion upon our child, but allow him to choose on his own when he grows up. But most of our arguments centred around money. He hates it that I have to give 10% tithes. He thinks the church pastors are getting all the money. He argues if I can give that much, why can’t I give the same to the buddhist temple? And why did I work and then have the church tax me on top of my income tax? Eddie was always, always careful with money; and he saw my tithes as a sheer waste, and I think it slowly made us grow apart.
I never thought it would be so difficult to make him understand! Must my love for him always oppose my love for God?
I understood now the wisdom of the verse in 2 Corinthians 6:14. I love Eddie dearly. I don’t regret sharing my life with him, no. But I do wish I had prepared myself better for this marriage, or at least clarified with him before jumping into it. It would have been much different, I believe. Perhaps I would not be married even. But I always know God would have a better plan for me, even if it was life without Eddie.
I do ramble on! I will keep my subsequent posts as short as possible. Till then, I better sign out now! You can contact me on my facebook at http://www.facebook.com/people/Stephanie_Chan/1169463738. You can send me a message!
Take a look at some action shots from our weekly practices.
[tags : easter broken easter drama gtpj glad tidings church event]
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